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  But he was perfectly capable of setting it aside, right?

  Eric kicked off his sneakers and sprawled on the couch. Maybe this was what he needed, he told himself. Some solitude. Put on some music and crack open a pint of cookie dough ice cream. No phone. No Twitter.

  Where was the stereo again? His eyes wandered restlessly about the oversize room. Vaulted ceilings. Hardwood floors. Black leather furniture. White baby grand piano in the corner. Someone had arranged his collection of Grammys, AMAs, and MTV moonmen on top. Home, sweet home. All very tasteful…and very unfamiliar.

  This place felt no more like home than any of the swanky hotel suites where he laid his head most nights. Between his tour schedule and his acting and modeling duties, he barely cobbled together six weeks a year in LA. He wasn’t exaggerating when he told Maury that he didn’t have time for a girlfriend. Not unless he found one that he could cart along wherever he went—a handy-dandy girlfriend the size of a cell phone, who fit conveniently in the back pocket of his jeans.

  He couldn’t help but wonder what Tessa thought of the Christmas song tonight. Had she caught the hatchet job he’d done on the second verse? He’d covered it at the time with a cocky grin straight into the camera, and Maury had slapped him on the back afterward for a job well done. But did Tessa see through it? Was she satisfied? Or did she know that smile was fake?

  “Who am I kidding?” Eric said to himself as he reached again for his back pocket. He’d die of boredom if he spent the evening all alone, eating ice cream straight from the carton.

  Eric pulled out his phone and opened Twitter, but he saw in an instant that it was set to the wrong account:

  Eric Thorn @EricThorn

  FOLLOWERS

  14.8M

  He rarely bothered to open his real account nowadays, but he’d been commanded from on high to tweet about the Christmas special. His eyes skimmed down to the message he sent out just before airtime.

  Eric Thorn @EricThorn

  Wishing an early #HappyHolidays to my amazing fans! What do you want for Christmas? All I want is for you to watch me LIVE tonight at 8 PM!

  70.4K ♥ 257.2K

  He hadn’t crafted that particular gem himself. Some social media expert from the TV network had stood over Eric’s shoulder and dictated the words. The replies had started pouring in the moment he hit Tweet. Now Eric couldn’t quite peel his eyes away fast enough to avoid reading the first few responses.

  Anna Thorn @EricAddict3

  @EricThorn ILY

  Eric Thorn Lover @EricLuv982

  @EricThorn FOLLOW ME!

  MET @MrsEricThorn

  @EricThorn I’ll give you ANYTHING you want for Christmas, baby

  Eat Me Eric @EricThornPorn

  @EricThorn I WANT U TO HIT THE FOLLOW BUTTON WITH UR ROCK HARD—

  Eric choked. His thumb slammed down on the home button, clicking the app closed before his eyes could register another word. He really should have known better than to look at the replies. Nothing like a dose of holiday cheer from his amazing fans to ruin his mood. He was more than a little tempted to chuck his phone across the room just to obliterate that last one from his memory. It wouldn’t have been the first time he cracked his screen that way.

  But he didn’t throw his phone. He didn’t need to resort to violence—not anymore. He merely slumped back against the couch cushions and pulled up Tessa’s profile. He felt his anger ebb the moment he read her reply.

  Tessa H @TessaHeartsEric

  @EricThorn All I want for Christmas is to see a smile on your face. Love you! Merry Christmas!

  Eric let out a long breath, releasing the tension from his shoulders. He knew her reply was genuine. That was what made it so sweet. He’d always assumed that the fans who tweeted shirtless pictures of him only viewed him as a piece of meat, but Tessa had proven him wrong. Honestly, she must be the only fan left who saw him as a human being. It was unbelievable, the effect she had on him. She must have had some kind of supernatural power, the way she could slice through his mood with a few simple words. He knew she’d have him laughing again in no time if he DM’ed her. With a few flicks of his thumb, he switched accounts and fired off a message.

  Taylor: This fandom is so f’ed up.

  Tessa obliged him with an instantaneous response. Eric kicked up his feet on his living room couch and settled in for a chat.

  Tessa H: What happened?

  Taylor: The fangirls! Can’t they just wish him a Merry Christmas? It’s disgusting, some of the shit they tweet at him.

  Tessa H: Well, I wished him a Merry Christmas.

  Taylor: You’re a sweetheart. The rest of them can rot.

  Tessa H: I know, it goes too far sometimes. Did you see the picture MET tweeted after he messed up the Christmas carol?

  Eric’s brow furrowed. MET? He didn’t recognize the acronym. Was that another TMZ?

  Taylor: What’s MET? A gossip blog?

  Tessa H: No, you dork! @MrsEricThorn. It’s the most important account in the whole fandom! How are you so clueless?

  Perfect. Eric couldn’t help but laugh. He’d been vaguely aware of that account, of course. He knew it had a lot of followers. But the most important person in the fandom? Really?

  Taylor: Silly me. And here I thought the most important person in the fandom was that other douche rocket. What’s his name, again? Oh yeah…Eric Thorn.

  Tessa H: You know what I mean. The most important fan account :P

  Taylor: Got it. And does Eric’s wife have an actual name?

  Tessa H: Everyone just calls her MET. She likes to maintain an air of mystery. Kind of creeps me out, to be honest. Go look at her recent tweets.

  Eric entered the handle and pulled up the tweet that Tessa meant.

  MET @MrsEricThorn

  Haha way to go @EricThorn. Retweet if you think he should’ve performed the song like this ;) #EricThornObsessed

  MET had illustrated her point with a doctored photo, and he drew in a sharp breath when he saw what it depicted: Eric Thorn, shirtless, splayed across a bed, bound and gagged with duct tape.

  A shudder passed through Eric’s frame as he glanced at the retweet count, hovering just north of 1K. How could there be a thousand people out there who didn’t find that image utterly repugnant? It was all fun and games until someone decided to act it out in real life. If anyone made an edit like that of Ariana Grande, they’d probably get arrested. But he was a guy, so that somehow made the sexploitation funny…and retweetable.

  In the past, that picture would have sent him through the roof, but Eric felt surprisingly calm about it now. He merely rolled his eyes and tucked one arm behind his head as he slouched down farther on the couch.

  Taylor: Ugh! He’s a human being! How is that pic supposed to make him feel?

  Tessa H: I know. It’s gross. But he’s kind of asking for it in a way.

  Taylor: Why? Because he messed up the song? That justifies sexual harassment?

  Tessa H: No, but he’s the one who keeps flashing everybody. And why does he put his sex life into his song lyrics, if he doesn’t want to be objectified?

  One of Eric’s eyebrows quirked up at that. His sex life? What was she talking about? He knew the tabloids liked to pair him off with a different female celebrity every week, but Tessa knew better than to believe that crap.

  Taylor: What sex life??

  Tessa H: Um, have you heard “Aloe Vera”? That song’s obviously about some girl he was sleeping with.

  Taylor: C’mon, Tessa. You’re smarter than that.

  Tessa H: What? You think it was about a man?

  Eric hesitated. He’d never told another living soul the true meaning of “Aloe Vera.” Not even Maury. The record label probably wouldn’t have released the song if they’d known. It made his heart rate quicken to think about telling Tessa—unnerving but strangely exhilarating at the same time.

  Taylor: Not a man…maybe THE man.

  Tessa H: ????

  Taylor: There’s more t
han one way to get screwed. That’s all I’m saying.

  Tessa H: OK. So…now he got screwed by THE man?

  Taylor: Listen to the words. “You said, ‘Baby, take your clothes off. Get rid of those tan lines.’”

  Tessa H: So?

  Taylor: Who told him to take his clothes off?

  Tessa H: Ummm…Ariana Grande? :P

  Taylor: All I know is, he was just this shy kid with an acoustic, and then he got signed by a major label, and the next thing you know, he’s prancing around half-naked all the time.

  Tessa H: So you think his record label told him to take his clothes off?

  Taylor: Think about it. “I fell asleep to the sound of your voice whispering to me.” Maybe he feels like they kinda seduced him with a bunch of sweet talk.

  Tessa H: But the rest of it? “You left me there to blister. Ran off with the only key”?

  Taylor: Right. They locked him in. To his RECORD DEAL.

  Eric held his breath, waiting for her reaction. Would she get it? He had a feeling it would probably blow her mind. It was her favorite song, after all. She knew the lyrics almost as well as he did.

  Tessa H: OMG, Taylor. Are you kidding me right now?

  Taylor: I know, right? It totally fits!

  Tessa H: Talk about projecting.

  Taylor: How is this projecting?

  Tessa H: Because YOU feel trapped by YOUR job. You’re talking about YOU. Eric Thorn is not YOU. Get it through your head!

  Eric bowed his head in disappointment. Projecting. Tessa’s favorite word. She had the truth staring her in the face, but she didn’t see it. She couldn’t see it, he knew, because it was only a tiny sliver of the truth. Not the real secret that would blow her mind…

  He shifted uncomfortably, unable to avoid the stab of guilt. Maybe he should tell her everything, right then and there. How amazing would that feel? He had the perfect opening right now. He knew exactly how to do it.

  Eric switched back over to his real account, @EricThorn, and began to compose a new DM from there:

  Eric: Not projecting if you’re actually talking about yourself, Tessa…

  Eric stared at the words in his message bar, but he didn’t quite have the nerve to hit Send. Not yet. He wasn’t ready. Who knew how she might react? He hastily deleted the message, sucking in a shaky breath.

  Still, he had to give her something—something more than ridiculous theories from Taylor the snarky fanboy. Tessa had become one of the most important people in his life, and he didn’t even follow her from his real account. He should’ve done it back when the #EricThornObsessed thing was trending. For the life of him, he couldn’t remember why he hadn’t. If any fan deserved a follow from @EricThorn, it was @TessaHeartsEric.

  What would happen, he wondered, if he hit the Follow button now? A cautious smile crept onto his face as he imagined her reaction.

  He couldn’t resist. His thumb made swift contact with the button.

  • • •

  Tessa lay on her stomach in front of the TV, bopping her feet in time to the music. She’d recorded tonight’s Christmas special, and she hit Rewind to play Eric’s performance of “White Christmas” once again, while she waited for Taylor’s next reply.

  It was strange, she thought, the way Eric had forgotten the words tonight. It wasn’t like him. Hadn’t he rehearsed beforehand? Something must have happened to distract him. She studied the familiar face on the TV screen for clues. He started out the song slow and serious, with those hypnotic, ice-blue eyes staring straight into the camera—but then he faltered at the bridge, and he butchered the second verse.

  Dum dum dum of a white Christmas.

  The Christmas snowflakes all look…white…

  Tessa couldn’t help but giggle as his expression gave way to a self-deprecating smile. What was going through his head, she wondered. Had he panicked on the inside? Or was that crooked grin of his for real?

  She longed to ask Taylor for his take on the whole thing. He usually had a pet theory for everything Eric Thorn did. Pure fiction of course, but Tessa couldn’t deny that she found his ideas entertaining. Just look at the story he’d concocted about “Aloe Vera.” Tessa chuckled again at the thought. As if that song could be about anything other than a hot and heavy one-night stand.

  Where was Taylor, anyway? He’d gone silent for the past five minutes. She hit Pause on the TV and returned her full attention to her phone. She felt the urge to message him again, but she resisted.

  Her thoughts revolved around Taylor more and more these days. Even in her sessions with Dr. Regan, Tessa couldn’t seem to keep him out of her head. She and Taylor chatted every night, and their conversations lately had begun to cross the line from friendship to outright flirtation. She knew her feelings for him had deepened, and she found it vaguely unsettling. As much as she liked Taylor, and as much as she got the feeling that he might like her back, Tessa couldn’t shake the lingering sense that he was holding something back—some secret he didn’t quite have the nerve to tell her.

  Tessa twisted a strand of hair around her finger as she contemplated her phone. Maybe she should cut the conversation short tonight. Wish him good night and go to sleep. She was just about to input the message when a notification flashed onto her screen. Not a new message from Taylor. Her eyes landed on a different username instead:

  Eric Thorn (@EricThorn) followed you

  Her finger went slack. The lock of hair fell limply against her shoulder. A whole lifetime seemed to pass before she could comprehend the words.

  Eric.

  Eric Thorn.

  Eric Thorn followed…

  “Oh my God,” she whispered. “OH. MY. GOD!”

  18

  CHANGE OF KEY

  Eric paced his living room, eyes glued to his screen as he refreshed his Twitter feed again. “Come on, Tessa.” Hadn’t she seen the notification yet? What was taking her so long? “Come on! You must have seen it!”

  As if in answer to his words, a new message popped up at the top of her recent tweets.

  Tessa H @TessaHeartsEric

  OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!

  A broad smile creased his face. “There we go.” The standard fangirl response. Only a slight step up from when they tweeted random strings of capital letters. He could just imagine the way she must have been bouncing around her room right then, screaming her head off.

  Something about that mental image made Eric pull up short. A new thought had entered his head. Would she DM him something now? The fans usually did after he followed them. Selfies, more often than not. After all these months, would he finally catch a glimpse of Tessa’s face?

  He sank down heavily on the piano stool in front of the white baby grand, and his fingers picked out a minor chord progression as he waited. He eyed his message tab impatiently, watching for a new DM, but he gave up after a moment.

  To hell with it. He couldn’t take the suspense. He needed to hear more from her than “OMGGGGGGGGGGGGG GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!” He switched accounts back to @EricThornSucks and fired off a new message from there.

  Taylor: Tessa? Are you there? What happened?

  Eric tapped a single note in a rapid staccato as he waited for her reply.

  Tessa H: ERIC FOLLOWED ME!!!!!

  Taylor: Whoa!

  Tessa H: OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

  Taylor: Are you freaking out?

  Tessa H: OMG MY HANS AR SHAKING SPO BAD

  Taylor: Deep breaths. Deep breaths. Don’t hyperventilate on me now.

  Tessa H: I can’t stop smiling. OMG, why did he follow me? It doesn’t even make any sense!

  Taylor: Well, you did wish him a Merry Christmas.

  Tessa H: OMGGGGG HE MUST HAVE SEEN IT! HE SAW MY TWEET! ERIC THORN SAW MY TWEET!!!!!!!

  Eric laughed out loud. His left hand remained on the piano keys, and he picked out a simple melody, switching to a major key. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this way: so happy he couldn’t wipe away
the goofy grin.

  Happy because he’d made her happy.

  “Oh, Tessa,” he said, chuckling at the phone. “Tessa, Tessa, Tessa. I love you.”

  The music stopped abruptly as his words hung in the air. Just a figure of speech, of course. He didn’t really mean that. Obviously not.

  Eric blinked away the thought. He swiveled on the piano stool and brought the DM conversation back around to the topic he had in mind.

  Taylor: So? Did you send him a selfie?

  Tessa H: Stop. Don’t even say it.

  Taylor: He probably wants to see a reaction shot.

  Tessa H: Ummm, hello? I don’t like strangers looking at me. That’s one of my triggers.

  Taylor: No strangers. Just Eric. No one else would ever see.

  Tessa H: NO WAY

  Taylor: Trust me, Tessa. He’s a guy. He’ll like it.

  Tessa H: How would you know? You have no idea what I even look like!

  Eric bit his lip. “Not for long,” he murmured. The corners of his mouth quivered with anticipation. He could sense her resolve starting to crumble. She just needed one more little push…

  Taylor: Maybe not exactly, but I know you’re beautiful.

  Tessa H: You don’t know that.

  Taylor: Yes I do. Maybe YOU don’t know that.

  Tessa H: I don’t know I’m beautiful?

  Taylor: Maybe.

  Tessa H: OK, Taylor. And let me guess… That’s what makes me beautiful?

  Eric paused. He smacked himself lightly on the forehead when he realized what he’d done.

  Taylor: Shit. I just plagiarized a song, didn’t I?

  Tessa H: Don’t tell me you’re a One Direction fanboy now?

  Taylor: Hey, that was a brilliant song. Teenage girls love to hear how they’re all secretly beautiful :P

  Eric’s mouth twisted, his giddy smile transforming into a smirk. He knew why his mind had gone to that song, of course. He’d been listening to it the other day. He had a new single in the works along the same lines. “Snowflakes” was slated for release in time for the holidays—a surprise Christmas gift to all his lovely fans.